Maybe You Should
by Twilightholic-Tanya
Summary: The much wanted sequel to Never Should Have is here. Continue the story as Edward reunites with Bella But beware cause my story is never a fairy tale and always a Soap Oprea. Will they get their happily ever after or just another drama? complete!
1. Moving On

**Wow I could not believe the response I got for Never Should Have. It honestly was just a story that was inspired by a song but grew to be so much more. I am truly happy that everyone liked it. Now because I am so nice I am posting the much wanted sequel to Never Should Have. I hope you enjoy it. Okay so some things concerning vampires may be different but bear with me please.**

**IMPORTANT: must read Never Should Have first or you will not understand it. Or maybe you will…**

**That is all thank you.**

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_**SIX YEARS LATER**_

"Alice I can not understand why you're making me do this?" I growled from the front seat of the car. It was raining again as it usually did in London. I was use to it and rather enjoyed living here. As much as someone like me could enjoy something.

"Because I need new clothes and I hate watching you locked up in that room all day. Only coming out to hunt. You're making Jasper sick," she answered and I rolled my eyes.

It had been six amazingly long years for me. During that time we were able to gain enough control to be around humans but not for long or many of them. Alice certainly gained enough to go shopping; sure enough she would find the stores that were most expensive making sure less people would be there.

"Why don't you do something? Come inside with me well have fun," she said with a bright smile and I rolled my eyes. "As much as I love you Alice, shopping will never be one of my favorite pastimes," I told her and she pouted. "Fine when I call you to pick me up," she said and slid out of the car.

Where would I go now? I couldn't go back home because Alice would kill me. I parked the car in front of a small coffee shop and got out. It was mostly empty therefore okay to go in. I wasn't going to push my control anymore than I should.

I took a seat in a far away corner away from the rest of the costumers and ignored the buzzing sound in the back of my head; I didn't even bother to concentrate on what they were thinking.

I guess everyone once in there life wishes they knew what others around them were thinking but I would never make that wish again if I knew it would have came true. I hated hearing everyone's thoughts. Some were private and not to be shared while others were mean and not wanted to be heard.

You could never enjoy just being somewhere in the quiet because you were always followed by the low buzz of peoples thoughts.

I did my best to ignore them as I sat back on my chair and closed my eyes. My vision was yet again met with her face.

Bright and warm and eyes full of laughter. She was always so happy. She smiled and her eyes brightened and my stomach was suddenly tight. I opened my eyes not wanting to look at her anymore for the pain that accompanied her face was too much.

But I didn't matter; whatever I did she was constantly in my thoughts. I had told Alice not to look out for her. To leave her alone and hoped that, that would bring me to forget about her at least a fraction closer but no. Nothing helped to keep her out of my thoughts. Even after six years she haunted my thoughts and was always behind the lids of my eyes.

She would be 24 now. I wonder if she changed at all. I wouldn't let Alice look, because it would just make it that much harder to move on. I was sure I would never be able to do that but I wanted to get over her. At least that was what I told myself.

Alice had told me she was in college. I was happy for her. She was moving on with her life like she should.

The door opened to the shop and I froze at who had walked in.

_(Okay people this is where the books and my story differ. I am not going to make Bella's blood stronger to Edward because it will already be hard for him. He is still fairly new to being a vampire and I don't think he could handle it if Bella was his "la tua cantante")_

It would have been enough to get my heart going again.

It was _her_. She was taller but not much. He hair was long like it always had been and she was laughing.

It was truly her. The girl that had haunted me ever since I left. The girl whose last words to me were 'I love you' and all I could do was stare while she laughed and held on to the arm of the man she walked in with. He smiled and pushed her hair away from her face. She looked at him and I could detect happiness. He wrapped and arm around her waist and she scooted closer to his side. Who was he?

She turned and looked me in the eye. Her smile faded from her face and her eyes went wide. Maybe it was just wishful thinking but I could have sworn they brightened.

_Bella_

BPOV

He was there. He was sitting in a chair with wide eyes as he gazed at me. It was really him and there no mistaking it. But as I looked at him I noticed something wasn't the same.

If possible he was even more beautiful than I remembered and he was pale. More than just pale he was white. And his eyes. oh his eyes. They were not the warm summer grass green eyes they were a cool topaz color. How did his eyes change? He looked like he hadn't aged a bit. My heart seemed to slow down and I wanted to go to him. It was like he was magnet and I found it harder to stay where I was. Then before I knew it he was out the door and gone.

"Bells what's wrong?" I heard Alex ask me. _(Okay totally made up character cause I couldn't find someone to fit and I couldn't do to Jake what I'm gonna do to him_)

As I stared at the doors I shook my head and turned to look at him.

"Nothing," I mumbled as I blushed and looked away. Could it really be him? My heart beat was too fast to be healthy and I hated that even thought it had been so many years he still had an effect over me. He wasn't allowed to have this affect on me. But no doubt he did.

But after so many years he still had the trait of running away.

EPOV

"Why didn't you tell me?!" I shouted at Alice. She widened her eyes and said nothing.

"Don't play that innocent crap with me! You know very well what I'm talking about," I growled and felt myself go unnaturally calm.

"Jasper," I said through gritted teeth and he came to stand besides Alice. "I'm not taking it back until I'm sure you're calm enough," he simply stated and I growled. I wanted to be annoyed with him but I could not feel it.

"Jasper just leave him alone, it's not like he's going to do anything," Alice said and I felt the fury boil back in me. "How could you not tell me?"

"You told me not to look in on her. Honestly all I knew was that she was in college I had no idea she came to the University of London," Alice said and I held the bridge of my nose as I started to pace. Trying to calm myself. I groaned and plopped myself in the small sofa we had in the living room. "Why did she have to come here? Out of all the places to go she came here. She is intent on torturing me isn't she?" I mumbled talking to no one and every one.

"Edward well I do know something else?" Alice mumbled hesitantly and I looked at her. Well glared really but my anger hadn't warn off yet. "What is it Alice?" I asked darkly and her eyes diverted mine.

"Well did you happen to see her with someone?" she asked and I instantly remembered the man in the shop. I was too focused on Bella to get a good look at him but I didn't remember the feeling of hate he made me feel.

The door suddenly flew opened and Emmett walked in followed my Rosalie.

"Hello," Emmett said using his very praticed accent. I rolled my eyes and Rosalie smacked his shoulder. His eyes darted around the room taking in everything. "What bit you today?" Emmett asked as he examined me. "Nothing," I muttered and walked away and toward my room.

I lay on the floor not bothering to move.

I had seen her and it was as though I had suddenly come back to life. I hadn't even noticed how much I missed her. I knew there was a pain but seeing her made me feel like I had gone an eternity without sun and she suddenly brought the light back.

I wanted to see her again but knew it was best if I didn't. Best for her and best for me.

But just thinking about seeing her made me lighter and I found I wanted it. I wanted to see her again if only one more time. Now that the thought was in my head it was going to take a lot to take it out.

The last memory of us together for me was when we were in the park. I remembered the night so clearly. We had been talking about our future when Charlie came and suddenly yanked her away from me and as he pulled her away she turned to me and mouthed the three little words that I had missed so much. I love you.

And then I remembered _him_. The man she had walked in with. She was laughing with him and smiling. It made me angry. It made the pain I had for her so much stronger as I realized she had done what I asked her too.

She had moved on and I was supposed to be happy. I was supposed to but I wasn't. I was angry and hurt but I knew it was best for her.

A soft knock on the door alerted me that Alice was coming. She opened the door slowly and made her way to my side. I didn't bother to move or to look at her. She lay next to me and sighed.

"So what about him?" I asked again and could reluctance in her thoughts.

"Just spit it out already Alice?" I told her and she sighed yet again.

"You really miss her don't you?" she asked and I shrugged really wanting to avoid this topic. "I'm pretty sure she missed you too. She loved you a lot. I could see it the day at the hospital. She was really hurt," Alice said avoiding the topic I wanted to hear most about and bringing up the one it _I_ wanted to avoid.

"You let her in the room didn't you?" I asked and turned my head.

_Yeah we did_ I nodded knowing that. "So now that were done avoiding the topic can we go back to it?" I questioned.

"Are you sure you want to hear it?"

"Why wouldn't I? It can't be any worse than seeing her again," I sighed.

"Well the man you saw her with was her…um…her fiancé," Alice said and my heart was torn. I was wrong. It could be so much worse.

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**Okay peoples you know the drill. Review for me and I update for you. I think it is a very good deal. Anyway I hoped you liked it and don't worry because I am a total sap for having Edward and Bella together that I wouldn't even try to break them apart. It will all work out in the end, you'll see. Please review and tell me what you think.**

**Lots of love Twilightholic-Tanya**


	2. Reruns

**Wow some babysitter I am. I was changing my youngest nephew and I go to check on the two older one's and one of them is gone. I looked around the whole house thinking 'oh my god I lost my nephew in my own house' and it turns out he was hiding in a cabinet in the entertainment center. Man the things little boys will do. Anyway I wanted to thank you all for the reviews. That is like the most I have ever gotten on a first chapter. That is all thank you.**

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BPOV

"So what would you want our kids to look like? You know when we decide to have them?" Alex asked as we ate our dinner on the small table. I was immediately reminded of the time Edward and I had that conversation. It was the last time I got to see him well alive I guess.

Today was the only exception. "I think I want them to have your eyes," I said as I looked over Alex. Alex was tall and blonde. He had the long skater boy kind of hair cut and his eyes were a grey blue color. They were beautiful eyes and yet not the eyes I will ever truly fall in love with. Not the eyes that haunted my dreams.

He smiled and shook his head. "No matter what you're going to want your children to have color eyes instead of brown. You truly don't know how pretty your eyes are," he said and took a bite of his food.

"You're not the first to tell me that," I said and he laughed. "So who was the first? Was it you're first love?" he teased and I blushed and looked away. "It was wasn't it? Well my first love told me the same thing about our children having my eyes," he said.

"So who was your first love?" I asked never really hearing about his past relationships.

"Some girl you wouldn't know. We started dating in high school and I found out she cheated on me. Broke it off and haven't seen her since. How about you? I know as much as I wish I were I am not you first love. So tell me about this lucky guy," he said and I blushed.

I wish I hadn't brought this up. "He was someone I dated in high school. A foster child and he had a bad record. Charlie didn't approve of him and we had to date in secret. To be honest I thought he was going to be the one I met when I walked down the aisle. But he moved away and forgot about me. I never saw him again," _until today that is_…

"Wow little Bella dated a bad boy. I never knew you had it in you," Alex teased and I rolled my eyes. "He didn't deserve you," Alex said and I sighed.

I got up from the table and took my plate to the sink. "I'm going to go for a walk, I'll be back soon," I said and threw my coat over me. Alex nodded and went into the living room. I always went for a walk after dinner and he always let me do it alone. I was glad I needed that time to just be me.

I started the walk down the dimmed streets walking no where and everywhere. I stuck a hand into my jacket and pulled out the letter that I had saved for six years. I was going to get married maybe it was time I just threw it out.

I crumbled the paper and threw it on the ground and then I heard a chuckle. I turned around to see a dream and nightmare put in one.

"Hasn't anyone ever told you not to litter?"

EPOV

I had to be careful if I was going to be around her. But I couldn't resist as I walked toward her and threw the crumpled piece of paper at her. She caught it and stuffed it in her pockets as she turned pink.

I held my breath afraid of what that small pooling of blood might do to my control.

I had to keep my distance from her. I couldn't be too close because it would make it that much harder to be around her.

She turned and walked away with out another word to me. I was hurt but I knew if anything I deserved a slap in the face rather than just her walking away. Yet that was so much more painful.

I should have turned away and gone back home but I didn't. I never did what I was supposed to.

I followed her and caught up with her in no time. "So married huh?" I asked as I took steps beside her careful to keep my distance at the same time.

She stopped and turned toward me. I had forgotten just how beautiful she really was.

"How did you know?" she asked and I could hear the bitterness in her voice. "Alice knows a lot of things," I said and she looked shocked. "She still has um those visions?" she asked and I nodded.

She looked at me and I could see pain in her eyes. I should leave. I shouldn't have come to her at all. "Why?" she breathed and her breath washed over my face.

Damn it! I closed my eyes and clenched my fist as I tried to gain control of the instinct that told me to kill her.

"What?" I asked when I was sure I was under control.

"Why did you leave? Why was it the only thing you gave me was this?" she said and reached into her pockets to get the crumbled piece of paper. She threw it at me and I caught it. I opened carefully not wanting to rip it and read what it was.

My letter.

She had saved it after all these years. There were parts were the ink was smeared as though the letter had come in contact with water but Bella's smell was all over it and I realized that she had cried over it.

I folded the letter neatly and sighed. "I'm sorry," was all I said as I turned to walk away.

"I don't need you to run away. You've done plenty of that, what I need is answers on to why you just played with me!" she shouted and once again managed to spark my anger.

"You think I like running away! If I had the choice I would never do it but I never have the choice. I never get to have what I want and sometimes I barely get what I need. I never meant to hurt you and I never played with you. To be someone as smart as you, you really just don't get it," I said and I could see pure anger in her eyes.

"No Edward I don't get it! I don't get why you planned our future and told me you loved me and then disappeared on me for six freaking years! I'm sorry I just don't have a high enough IQ to figure it out!" she shouted and I was filled with pain.

"You have no idea how hard it was to do what it did! It's not like you really suffered anyway! You seem to have gotten by real good with out me!" I growled knowing my words weren't fair.

"Because I had no other choice! Do you think I just bounced back after that?! No I suffered for months until I really looked at your letter and decided I was going to do exactly what you ask me to!" she shouted and I hadn't noticed how closed we had gotten.

I had nothing else to say to her and having her so close to me was making to hard to think. Then Bella did something only Bella would do. She stretched up and kissed me.

I hadn't forgotten how she tasted but it was better if we were human. Having her so close and touching me was driving my instincts crazy. My mind and my instincts were not getting along at the moment.

One side I wanted to continue kissing her and feel the warm lips I had dreamed about for what seemed like forever and my other side was fighting the urge to take her life right then and there.

I grabbed her face softly and pushed her away. Her eyes were wide and shocked at her own actions and I suddenly felt horrible. "I'm sorry, but I never have a choice," I said and ran from her.

It started to rain and I felt better. Her heat and smell was slowly washing away from me. I was stupid. I should have done that to her. I shouldn't have gone to see her again but I was never one known to follow the rules.

_BPOV_

I stood there stunned as the rain started to fall on me. What had I just done? I was going to get married I couldn't go kissing my ex.

But the kiss wouldn't leave me alone. It still hung on my lips. It was so different than what I remembered. He was so much colder and his taste. It no longer tasted like apples. Sweet and tart at the same time instead it was so sweet. It was something I had never encountered in my life before and it made me want more.

No Bella stop it! I told myself. I could not be doing this. I had to think about Alex. I shook my head and started to run to my apartment as the rain started to get heavier.

"Bells that you?" Alex asked when I entered the house. "Uh yeah," I said still dazed as I took off my jacket.

"How was you're walk?" he asked as he came over to kiss me. I turned my head so that his kiss landed on my cheeks instead of my lips. "Um fine. I have a headache I'm going to go to bed," I said and headed for the shower.

I stepped in and started to cry as the hot water fell down on my skin. Why did _he_ have to come in my life and ruin everything? Things were going great and then he had to come along!

Couldn't he let my life just be a tame ride instead of making it such a rollercoaster?

I got out of the shower, dressed, and headed to bed. Alex was still watching T.V. so I had the bed to myself. For a few hours that is.

I threw the blanket over my shoulders and tried not to cry. Seeing him had opened the whole that I had just closed. It was going to take so much more too just sew it back up.

I closed my eyes and started to drift into dreams where he would surely be the star, like he had been for six years now.

My dreams always played the same thing. Watching the only person who ever held my heart run away from me. Maybe tonight would be different, because I was tired of seeing reruns.

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**Okay people I am like beyond happy with reviews I have. It is by far the most I have ever gotten on a first chapter. So please tell me what you think and I you get an update faster. I sorta like this chapter.**

**I wonder if you guys could beat 32 reviews. Let's see if I can get more for this chapter and if I do I will absolutely have a chapter up like by tomorrow. Well I always have a chapter up by tomorrow but let's see if you can beat it! Thanks for all the reviews and I love them so keep 'em coming**

**Lots of love Twilightholic-Tanya**


	3. Expecting Torture

**Something was going on with my email and it wasn't letting me get any alerts on whether or not I had reviews and stuff so sorry if you ended up asking me something and I didn't respond to like now i am so sorry, but my email is working and everything is going great. This is for all my lovely reviewers who have like really just made me have a cheesy grin on my face. Anyway you guys may hate me for this chap but um well I just hope you like it anyway. That is all thank you.**

**P.s. I just wanted to remind you. My story is under DRAMA for a reason.**

Life is tough enough without having someone kick you from the inside.-Rita Rudner

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Seeing Bella was a mistake but I couldn't help myself. I had to see her. Her taste still lingered on my lips and I wanted more.

I placed my hands over my eyes as I lay on my sofa. I had to get her out of my head. She was going to get married and I just couldn't ruin her life like that. I just couldn't come back in after being away for so long and then just make my appearance again.

I couldn't hurt her anymore and make myself even more of a monster. I couldn't. I had seen her like I wanted and now I knew it was time to just let her go. Let her live her life no matter how much pain it cost me.

I was tired of feeling sorry for myself and I knew I had to stop and just be happy for her.

_Someone isn't too happy today_ I heard the perky 'voice' that no doubt belonged to Alice.

"Now why would I be? I'm sure you saw what happened yesterday" I grumbled and heard my door open as she made her way over to me and sat in front of me. I turned my head to look at her and she had a sad expression on her face.

Her thoughts were forming a buzz in my head as she thought of so many things at once. She was keeping something from me.

I narrowed my eyes at her as she widened hers and looked like a perfect angel. Innocent and knowing at the same time, it was an expression that meant trouble.

"Are you keeping something from me Alice?" I asked and she shook her head.

_No why would you think that?_

"Because I have come to know how good you have gotten at blocking your thoughts and you only do that when you want to keep something from me so what is it?" I asked once again.

_Damn he knows me too well_

"Yes I do" I stated and she just smiled.

"So how was Bella?" she said trying to change the subject. Alice would tell me soon enough I might as well just let her tell me when she was ready.

"She has grown so much. Her face is so much more matured and she nearly knocked me breathless. I hated that I wasn't the one to watch her grow and learn and not be able to be the one who her father gives her too. I'm just a nightmare from her past and maybe it's time I just really forget about her," I sighed.

"Oh Edward you know it's for the best right?" Alice asked me and I stared at her.

"Yes Alice I know mentally it's what I'm supposed to do, but my feeling are such a difference. I don't want to let her go. I don't want the best thing that has ever happen to me go, but I believe I have no other choice," I grumbled and sat up on the sofa.

"I'm so sorry Edward," she said and I could see images of the past going through her head. No matter how many times I tried to reassure her, she still thought it was her fault for everything that happened and in a way I guess it was but I still didn't blame her.

"Alice I knew what you tried to do okay. I know that you saw what was coming but you didn't actually see you caused it. I let that go and maybe you should as well," I told her and she sighed.

"I can't Edward. I shouldn't have acted so stupidly and you have no idea how sorry I truly am and how much I regret it. If I could go back I honestly would change all of this so you could be with her," Alice said.

"Do you really think I have no idea?" I asked as I tapped a finger to my temple and she cracked a smile.

"I'm going to go for a walk. I need to just clear my head," I said as I stood up and headed for the door.

"Edward there was something I wanted to tell you but I have no idea how you're going to take this," she said and I raised an eyebrow at her.

"Edward I don't even think Bella knows it yet and I wasn't looking out for I swear but it just came…" Alice was starting to babble.

"Look Alice, tell me later I'm going to go out for a walk," I told her and left the room.

0.o.0.o.0.o

I kept thinking about her and trying to be happy for her but it was hard.

At least Bella was moving on like she said she would. She would have her nice little family and have her nice career and house like she always wanted. I was trying to be happy for her and really I was it was me I wasn't happy for but I had never been to wallow in self pity and it was amazing how she changed that.

Just as if she had been called on queue she turned the corner and came into my sight. How did she manage yet again to run into me?

She stopped and stared at me and so did I. There was at least two yards of distance in between us and we didn't move. But something seemed to take notice. I realized it was quiet.

Not many people were out due to how late the hour was and I couldn't hear her thoughts. I couldn't see what she was thinking. I tried to concentrated harder but I kept hearing other thoughts not hers.

It was if she wasn't even there. How did that manage to slip out of my notice on the last two visits?

She walked closer and I still couldn't hear her thoughts. Some how did this not surprise me. Bella was a one of a kind and it would only be expected that she was immune to my so called 'power'.

She stopped several feet away from me and looked up. "Hello, Mr. Masen," she said and I cracked a smile. "I'm a Cullen, now," I said simply and she nodded. She sighed and looked down at her feet.

"I'm sorry for my behavior yesterday and I shouldn't have done that. It was inexcusable," she mumbled and I laughed. She looked up at me with wide eyes and I shook my head.

"I just wasn't expecting that but then again you always seem to do the unexpected," I explain and she smiled a sad smile.

"Well what were you expecting?" she asked and I shrugged as we began to walk together. "I don't know. Maybe for you to slap my face and then walk away," I said ashamed.

She shrugged and looked ahead. "I always do the unexpected, right? So I'm going to do something that I didn't think I would even do. Why don't we just stay friends?" she said and held out her hand for me.

I stared at it not knowing if touching her would falter with my self-control. Then again I couldn't not accept it. It would be wrong. I took it and gave it a quick shake before I pulled away.

She rubbed her hand and looked at me with wide eyes. "Why are you so cold?" she asked and I mentally hit myself for not thinking about that.

"I don't know," I decided to tell her not able to think of a good enough explanation.

"So you seeing anyone?" she asked and I shook my head. "Um no not currently. I guess I'm just enjoying the single life which is more than I can say for you. So who is he?" I asked really not wanting to hear more about him but deciding it was for the best.

"His name is Alex. He's studying to be a doctor," she said and I nodded. I hated this Alex.

"How you meet him?"

"Well I was talking on the phone with Charlie one day and was about to cross the street. I was almost in the middle when someone yanked my arm and brought me back to the sidewalk. When I looked I saw a car speeding down the road. I was almost hit and he saved me. After that he bought me coffee and things just went from there," she said. Well at least he was able to protect her form her clumsy moments.

_(That actually happened to Me. I was talking on the phone and almost got hit by a car and some guy pulled me off the road but I never actually met him. Too bad)_

"Yeah well it hurts I can tell you that much," I mumbled not sure if she heard.

"So um the Cullen's I take it adopted you?" she asked and I shrugged.

"Yes all of us. We moved to London a couple years back," I told her and she nodded.

"Edward can I ask a question that has been bothering me?"

"Shoot."

"Well I remember your eyes being such a beautiful green color. I remembered them so well but now you have golden eyes. How did you make them change?" she asked and I once again mentally hit myself. Why the hell did she have to take so much notice?

"I don't really know. I can't give you an answer for that," I told her as close to the truth as I could. "You can't, or you won't," she said and I sighed. "I _can't_," I said and it was true. I couldn't give her an answer because that involved sharing information I couldn't give out.

"Okay then. So what have you been up to for the past…six years" she said and almost whispered the last part. "Nothing much really. Time really just seems to fly by," I said and it felt like the biggest lie I ever told in my life.

Time did not fly by. It dragged on and slowly made its way around. Time was torture.

"So um you're getting married. Wow that must be a big step for you?"

"Well nothings set until after I finish school but Alex is the only one I would marry. He's been there for me," she mumbled and I felt as though stabbing a knife into me would have been less painful that those words.

"Well I told you, you would find someone one who loved you," I said and I was amazed I got the words out.

"Yeah I guess you did," she said and looked at the ground.

She stopped abruptly and then looked up.

"Edward I really am sorry about yesterday and I really do mean if we could be friends," she said and all I could do was nod. She smiled and my breathing hitched.

"Well I have to go, but it was…nice seeing you again," she said and her eyes were filled with an emotion I couldn't understand. "Yes, it was so much more than that," I said and her eyes brightened and then dimmed.

She smiled and leaned in to place a kiss on my cheek before walking away. God I was an idiot. Why did I have to be such a pain seeker? Didn't I just tell myself I would leave her alone?

I guess I could only stick to stuff if I really wanted it.

0.o.0.o.0.o

"You're going to stay friends with her?" Alice asked and she seemed a bit angry.

"I don't know, Alice. Is it really a bad thing?" I said trying to find guidance not someone to yell at me.

"Edward I wanted to tell you this before you left but you wouldn't let me now it's going to hurt that much more," Alice rambled.

This wasn't good.

"Edward, Bella's pregnant."

This wasn't good at all.

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**WAIT!! Don't kill me because it's still early in the story and you have no idea how this is gonna turn out so wait until other chapters to come out so you can figure out the rest of the story. I am so sorry I didn't update yesterday but it was my mom's birthday and well come on I had to spend it with her so forgive me please. **

**Anyway review for me and more reviews equal faster updates and you all know how fast I update. So please please review and tell me what you think of it so far. Just whatever you do, don't kill me. **


	4. Running Away

**Okay I'm very aware that the last chapter was a jaw dropper. Yes you know what I'm talking about the stories that just make your jaw drop and go "WHAT!" but I will fix you jaw and this chapter will put a cheesy grin on you face and make you "I knew it" anyway I hope you like it. **

**BTW: you know I have read twilight and I have seen Dirty Dancing over a million times. I mean really I could tell you the story using phrases and quotes from each and I was wondering why anyone hasn't done a fanfic where Twilight and Dirty dancing are merged. I could so see Bella playing Baby and Edward, Jonny so why hasn't someone done it. I mean I would do it but I don't think I have it in me. If anyone knows of Dirty dancing with a twilight twist please tell me so I could read it or if you're going to do it tell me. I would really like to read it cuz I'm a fan of both. Anyway that is thank you.**

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_"Me? I'm scared of everything. I'm scared of what I saw, I'm scared of what I did, of who I am, and most of all I'm scared of walking out of this room and never feeling the rest of my whole life the way I feel when I'm with you"-Baby Houseman (Dirty Dancing)_

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"She's what?" I asked stunned and Alice looked away.

"I told you, I don't think she even knows it yet but I saw it. I see it," she mumbled and I felt as if someone had hit me with a wrecking ball. I couldn't move, I couldn't speak all I could do was look at her and it was pathetic.

"Wait what?" I couldn't seem to register the news she had just given me. "Are you sure Alice," I breathed and she nodded wile looking down. She felt horrible and I could see that in her thoughts but it wasn't her fault I sat down on my sofa and I buried my head in my hands.

"I just I never thought of that possibility until after the wedding," I mumbled and Alice patted my back.

She stood silent realizing that now was just not a time for words. "Well I'm sick of running away. I promised her we would be friends and I'll stick to that promise," I said and stood up.

"Edward I'm sorry I really am," she said and I shook my head.

Soon enough I found myself sitting in front of my piano my fingers toughing the ivory. To feel the soft keys under my fingers was like having a paint brush in a painters hand or having a pen in writer's hand. It was like giving a book to a vivid reader. It felt like it belonged there and you were meant to play it.

My hands began to move slowly at first but faster bringing a sound that was beautiful yet bitter at the same time. I felt a soft hand on my shoulder and I jumped. I turned to see Esme smiling softly at me and I stopped.

Even after I knew how she managed to sneak up on me while I was human she still succeeded even with my own powers and special powers. I had been so lost I hadn't even heard her thoughts behind me

When I played it may have been the only time where I managed completely to block out everyone's thoughts.

I sighed and turned as Esme took a step back.

_What's wrong?_

"Why would you ask?"

_Well as beautiful the piece you just played was, there was pain in it._

I smiled in awe that my music seemed to show what I was feeling. It was an accomplishment.

"Bella's in London," I told her and her smile faded. "Oh I see," she mumbled.

"She has a fiancée and she's um…pregnant," I said while whispering the last word.

I stole a glance at Esme to see her eyes widened a bit at the news. "Well at least she moving on like you asked her too," Esme said trying to lighten the mood.

"Yes, I guess I just never planned on being in her life and having to watch her move on,"

"What do you mean?" she asked confused.

"I promised Bella we could be friends" I said and smiled sheepishly. "Oh and did she make that proposal or did you?" she asked. "She did."

"And you're ready to do this?

"Not at all but I'm not running away again. I owe her that much don't I?" I was hoping to find the reassurance I needed with Alice.

"Yes, well I guess if you can handle it than I suppose it will be alright, just be careful," Esme sighed as she patted my shoulder once more and walked out of the room.

I turned back to my piano and began to play once more but this tune was different. It was softer and slower. I had made it to the middle when I realized I didn't have anything more to add. Yet this wasn't done I just couldn't find the right notes.

I stood there my hands hovering over the keys trying to find which one sounded better. I began to play again from the beginning hoping that I would be able to play right through. Again I stopped exactly where I did the first time. I couldn't believe that I couldn't come up with an ending. I sighed and pushed away.

I would have to come up with one at a later time but if I wanted to see Bella again it would be best I didn't take any risk. I would have to hunt.

0. o.0.o.0.o

I stood and waited at the corner where I knew Bella turned during her walk. I had come to the conclusion that Bella took walks everyday. Perhaps it was after dinner or just a walk when she felt like it but I was hoping that it was after dinner so I would be at the right time.

Just as I suspected she turned the around the corner and smiled at me. "I thought you would be here," she said and I smiled.

"Well since you didn't give me a phone number, I thought the only way to meet you would be like this," I said and she smiled once again.

She began to walk and I continued to walk by her side.

"So how's Alice and her um her visions?"

"She's doing better. She can control them now. Well sometimes. Sometimes they just pop into her head," I said trying to be truthful. She nodded and stuck her hand in her pockets.

"So um Alice saw something else yesterday," I said wondering how to bring this up.

"Oh yeah, what she see?"

"Well she saw you were expecting" I said while furrowing my brow.

"Expecting what?" Bella asked looking like total innocence.

I raised my eyebrows at her and her eyes went wide. She coughed and looked at me. "She saw me pregnant?" Bella said nearly shouting. An elderly couple turned there head as they walked past us.

_Such a beauty young love, but much too young to have children. Then again I'm one to talk, but everything worked out fine in the end. I wish the best for those two._

I heard the elderly women sigh in her thoughts. She took a tighter hold on her husband's arm and he looked down at her while pressing a kiss to her forehead. It hurt to see them like that and knowing I would never have it.

Bella followed my gaze and then snapped her finger in front of my face. "Yes she did," I said breaking out of my reverie. "That can't happen," Bella said and I shot her a look.

"Yes it can," is and she shook her head.

"Tell me Edward how can that happen if I am still very much a virgin," she said and tilted her head.

I was not expecting that. I blinked and looked at her but her face was a bright red. "So Alice lied to me," I said more to myself than I did for her but Bella shook her head.

"Probably not, because that may have come true if I had gone through with it," Bella said and I shook my head not wanting to imagine anything like that.

"But I believe you should wait. You know?" she said and I nodded.

I couldn't deny the relief that flooded my body as she said the words, but the thought still nagged in my head. She had almost gone through with it. I sighed and turned to Bella.

"Bella I have to go, but incase you ever need me," I said and slipped her my phone number. She nodded and I kissed her cheek softly as I took off.

BPOV

I stared as I watched Edward walk away.

I glanced down at his number and I wanted to call it. Just to hear his voice which I had lived without for so long. My cheeked burned where he kissed me. Even if his skin was cold he still made my skin feel like it was on fire.

I couldn't go and think of Edward like that. I loved Alex I truly did and I had learned to let go of Edward. It seemed he had forgotten about me and it would only be fair if I returned the favor.

I loved Edward and lately my dreams weren't scary anymore. They didn't have me wake up in cold sweat or wake me up because I was crying. They were peaceful and sweet and maybe all I needed Edward as now was a friend.

A friend who could make me feels better and makes me happy.

He only saw me as a friend and I was determined not to see him as anything more. I Loved Edward it was true but maybe it was more of just a friend love. I could love him as a friend and love Alex too couldn't I?

No I couldn't.

I couldn't because I had skipped dinner in order to have my walk early in hopes of seeing him again. I couldn't because I wouldn't let Alex kiss me anymore. I couldn't because when ever we did I kept seeing Edward and having a guilty feeling in the bottom of my stomach.

I couldn't continue this friendship, but I didn't want to end it. I didn't wan't to say goodbye and never ever again feel the way I felt when I was with him. I was scared because I knew the truth. I loved Edward Cullen.

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**Okay sorry but I was having a busy day. My summer has gotten a bit more hectic and I couldn't find time to update yesterday. Didn't I tell you this would put a cheesy grin on your face and I bet none of you saw that coming? You have no idea what I'm planning for this story so stick with me and you'll find out. **

**Okay well lots of love Twilightholic-Tanya**


	5. Fantasy Chapter

**Hey sorry my updates have been slow but forgive please. New chapter enjoy!**

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_"Between men and women there is no friendship possible. There is passion, enmity, worship, love, but no friendship."— Oscar Wilde_

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BPOV

"I'm gonna go for a walk," I called after I had finished the dinner dishes. "Hey Bella can I come?" Alex asked as I was putting on my coat.

"Why?" I asked shocked.

He had never wanted to come with me before. Alex's hand traveled to his neck and he looked down. "Well we never actually just spend time together just you and me and I thought it would be nice," he said and smiled at me his gray eyes tinkling. I had never seen eyes like his.

They were glorious. Such a dark blue with a gray tint around the iris. They were beautiful.

"I guess you could come but I should let you know that we probably won't be alone," I admitted sheepishly. I had hurried through dinner and the dished in hopes of meeting Edward yet again. I had seen him yesterday on my walk but I wanted to see more of him.

Even though I wasn't suppose to go on my walk yesterday because I had told myself I couldn't be friends with him. I couldn't help it. I was out the door as soon as I was finished eating. I tried my best to see him as a friend and in ways I did but I wanted him to be so much more.

I couldn't think like that though because I had Alex.

"What do you mean?"

"Well I've been meeting an old friend of mine on my walks."

"Really well who is she?" Alex asked with a smile and my stomach knotted.

"Well _his_ name is Edward," I mumbled and saw Alex eyes widen. "Oh well okay then. I'll be happy to meet an old friend of yours," Alex said and kissed my hand. He entangled his hand with mine and we left.

When we came to the corner where I met Edward my heart started to pound. I wasn't sure if it was in anticipation of meeting him or being extremely nervous. I would pick the latter.

We turned the corner and Edward was leaning against the wall smiling. He nodded at me and then turned his self to look at Alex. Not an ounce of surprise covered his face as he offered Alex his hand.

"Nice to meet you. You're Alex right?" Edward said kindly and Alex shook his hand. "Um, yes. You're Edward I suppose?" Alex asked and Edward nodded.

"Why don't we get coffee?" I offered and Edward's smile faded a bit.

"Sure sounds great," Alex chimed and we walked to the nearest coffee shop. We took a table in the far back. Alex went to get his and my drink and I was left alone with Edward.

"You don't drink coffee?" I asked and he smiled.

"No I prefer something less…bitter," he said and I nodded. "They have tea you know," I informed him and he smiled.

"That wasn't exactly the drink I was referring too. But it doesn't matter I am absolutely sure they do not serve what I drink," he said and I felt as though I was missing something.

What was Edward keeping from me?

EPOV

Bella gave me a strange look as Alex came back with her drink. Alex took a seat next to Bella and smiled. I knew he was examining closely to see if there was anything going on between Bella and I and I felt bad.

Did he honestly mistrust Bella that much he would believe she would do such a thing?

I tried my best to keep my disgust for him unnoticeable and I think I did well. "So Edward what do you do?" Alex asked trying to make small talk.

How would I answer that question and be honest. The truth was I hadn't entered a school for over six years. I couldn't, there were too many humans to be around and I didn't think I had enough control. Of course Carlisle did his best to keep us educated and he actually had me studying some of his medical journals.

"I'm studying medicine," I answered and Alex smiled.

"So am I. I hope to become a pediatrician," Alex said as he took a sip of his coffee. I envied him.

He was able to grow old and have a career and live and have children. While I was set to roam the earth forever in a body of a teenager. "And Bella are you still set in becoming a teacher?" I asked and her eyes widened.

"You remember that?" she asked and I nodded.

I remembered everything that had her in it. My memories were as clear as if they had happened yesterday.

"Yes Bella still plans on becoming a teacher," Alex said and smiled down at her. I was suddenly glad I did have Jasper's power at the moment because I could see he truly loved her and I could tell from his thoughts as well. It made me angry.

A beeping sound broke Alex away from his gaze at Bella and looked down. It was a beeper. A number flashed through his head and he was alert.

"I'm afraid I have to go. I'm sorry I can't stay. Nice meeting you Edward. I'll see you at home Bella," he said and dashed off. She watched him leave and turned back to me with a smile.

"He has somewhere to be," she said simply and I nodded. She played with the coffee in her hands before she looked up at me.

"How old are you Edward?" she asked and I smiled.

"The same as you why?" I asked and she shook her head.

"It's just I know I've changed some. I mean it was six years since I last saw you but I mean even though I changed and I look a bit older you still look, 17," she said and I smiled trying to hold back the laughter.

"Well time works differently for all of us I suppose doesn't it?" I asked and she nodded still trying to think. "Why do you always notice the little things that people seem to pass over?" I asked a bit frustrated and she shrugged.

"Sometime's you have to take the little things into account. It's like when you read a mystery novel. If you pass over the small things you'll come to notice that you have no idea what the book is about. You have to pay attention to the minor things because it turns out they're most important," she said simply and took a sip of her coffee.

"Do you always see life like a book?" I asked and she laughed.

"Well when you such a vivid reader as me you seem to see life like one big book. The only thing is the genre seems to change. You could live a chapter in romance and another in drama and another in mystery," she said with a laugh.

"Or fantasy," I mumbled and she took a sip of her coffee. "No I don't think so. Fantasy is too big of a genre. We pretty much live in one genre and it's called Realistic Fiction," she mumbled and I laughed.

"You'd be surprised at what genres different people live in," I told her and her brows furrowed in concentration.

"So you're saying you believe to live in Fantasy," she asked and I nodded. "Well I guess we all do live in different, genres and different chapters," she said as she stood up.

I followed her movements and we walked out of the shop.

"I mean we also live in different chapters too don't we? Some can live in romance while another just live in humor," she muttered bitterly and I tensed.

"That's not true. I never saw what we had as a joke," I said catching the double meaning of her words. "Well you sure acted like it," she growled and quickened her pace.

The sky –which had already been dark because of the late hour—darken more and I could tell as well as anyone could it was going to rain. I could already feel the rain drops on my skin.

"Bella it wasn't like that. You just never saw the way I did. You never knew the real story," I told her matching my pace to hers which was all too easy.

She stopped and turned her face up to me and the rain came down harder.

She was a picture of perfect. It truly heart to look at her and feel the way I did knowing she only regarded me as a friend.

"Well then Edward I'm ready to hear it. Tell me," she said and I looked away.

"I can't" I whispered and she snorted.

"I knew you wouldn't," she said and walked away from me.

The rain had soaked her hair and her jacket and I was sure I looked the same way. She was in the middle of the street when I found my voice.

"Bella wait," I called and she turned.

She looked at me with angry eyes and then I felt my nerves on high and my stomach tightened. This picture was all too familiar.

Something wasn't right.

BPOV

He stared at me with wide eyes and I was frozen in confusion. Then I heard a noise that no one wanted to hear if they were stuck in the middle of the road.

The sound of a car horn.

I turned to see the headlights in my face and I was now frozen in fear. I would have no time to move before he hit me and then I was hit with a force so strong it knocked the breath out of me. But it didn't come from the side I expected.

I felt something wrap around my waist and I felt as though I was flying until my back came into contact with something cold hard and wet.

Before I knew it I was leaning against a wall of a building with Edward in front of me. I stared past his shoulder as the car that was about to hit me sped on by much too fast than legal limits.

"How did you do that?" I asked as I stared at him. "I pulled you out of the way it wasn't too hard," he said as he backed away from me.

"No it was impossible. You were a block away from me and there was no way you would have been able to pull me away even if you were standing right next to me. We would have both been hit. How did you even make it over here so fast?" I said knowing what he had done was not normal.

"Bella," he whispered and I stared at his golden eyes that were filled with worry and maybe a little bit of fear.

What was he hiding from me and how the hell did he just save me? There was a reason and I wanted to find it. I wanted the truth!

"What are you Edward Cullen?"

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**Please forgive me for having slow updates it's just that summer is really been getting at me and I mean come on I deserve a little fun too. But I'm sorry and I will try to update soon again. Please review and tell me what you think if you want a faster update. Okay well I was going to update yesterday but for some reason fan fiction wouldn't let me update any of my stories so forgive me. at least now it's working. Review!!**

**Lots of love Twilightholic-Tanya**


	6. Kiss Goodbye

**Okay wow I love the reviews people they were amazing and I love that you love my story. You bring up my self-esteem, which I don't really have so thanks. Enjoy!**

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"I had seen my becoming a vampire in two lights: The first light was simply enchantment... But the other light was my wish for self-destruction." -Anne Rice, (Interview with the Vampire)

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EPOV.

I don't know what came over me but I did know I wasn't going to watch her die in front of my eyes. I wasn't about to have the only thing that mattered to me anymore just die.

I saved her and made another big mistake.

"What are you Edward Cullen?" were the words that escaped her lips and I froze. What was I to tell her?

I took several steps back and she looked at me with wide eyes. "What are you just going to run away again? Leaving me wanting answers and never getting them?" she shouted and her eyes became fierce.

"What do you want from me Bella?"

"I want answers."

"I can't give you them,"

"No but you can give me questions right?"

I turned my head away from her and I saw as she pushed away from the wall and took a step closer. I backed away slowly and she took another step.

"Why do you do that?" she asked as I once again placed a foot behind me.

She went to once again take another step closer, but being Bella, she lost her footing and tripped. I caught her before she hit the ground and she looked up at me.

I let her waist go as soon as she was on her feet but she didn't pull away from me. She placed her hands on my shoulder and continued to look at me with her brown doe eyes.

She slowly placed a hand on my cheek and I cut my air circulation it was hard to have her near. The warmth she gave my cheek was unbearable and I wanted more.

Something I couldn't have.

"Why do you _do_ that?" she asked once again and pulled her hand away but didn't back away. "Do what" I growled trying not breathe too much.

"Why does it look like you cringe from my touch and then it feels like you lean into it?" she explained.

"Why are you so perspective?"

"Because I don't like to be left out of things." Was her simple answer.

"Have you ever thought that maybe it was better if you were left out of things than know the truth," I said and her eyes glistened. She slowly moved her hands up from where they rested on my shoulder until they were on my neck.

Then she placed them on my cheek and she leaned up. I didn't breathe I didn't move I just watched her. I watched as I knew what she would do and yet I couldn't bring myself to move away from her and I realized I wanted it.

She touched her lips to mine and the feeling the jerked through me felt as though I had been electrocuted. Slowly my hands grasped her waist and I held onto her. I didn't want to let go. She pulled away and I could see tears in her eyes. She took a step back and gave a small piece of paper that was in her pockets and I took it.

I could see the tears falling from her eyes and gently rolling down her cheeks. She looked up at me and I was confused.

"Just leave me alone. Just go and don't look for me again please," She begged and I looked down at the paper. It was my number.

"Bella I…," I knew what she asked was fair but yet I felt like she deserved an explanation. Even if it meant I couldn't give it to her.

"Bella, I think this may be for the best. You say you always want to know, but this small information that I'm keeping from you. Well you don't want to know. It's the reason I live in fantasy," I said slowly and she looked up at me.

"Don't always assume things that aren't true. I want to know everything, but I think it's better you just leave," she said. I had nothing else to say.

I nodded and I turned to leave without looking back once.

It was the hardest thing I ever had to do.

BPOV

I watched him walk away from me and I felt my heart tear. I had taken for ever to get over him and I still wasn't. This was the worst thing I ever had to do.

My hair was soaked from the rain and I probably looked as if I had just jumped into a lake. My heart still pounding from the kiss. The tears were coming down harder but you would never know because of the rain.

I started to walk home feeling like I would never be able to be happy again but I couldn't continue this friendship with Edward. It was too much for me and I did what I wanted and I didn't get last time.

This time I got my kiss goodbye.

I walked into the apartment soaking wet. "Bella that you?" Alex asked from the bedroom. "Yea," I said trying not to choke up.

I walked into the bedroom to see Alex packing up his suit case. "Bella I need to go back home for a while," Alex said as he looked at me with sad eyes.

"Why?"

"My dad just had a heart attack. My sister called me and told me everything. I just have to go see him. I'll be back in a week," Alex said as he started putting stuff away.

"Is he okay?"

"Yea but I still want to see him. They said he's responding well to treatment but still…" Alex said trailing off.

"I'm going with you," I argued and Alex stopped packing to look at me. "Are you sure?" he said with big eyes. I nodded and he brought me into a hug.

"Thanks Bella. Are flight is for tomorrow at six," he said and I nodded as I got my bag and started to pack up.

At least I would be away from Edward.

EPOV

"Edward!" I heard Alice shout as I walked though the door.

"What?"

"Where have you been? I've been calling you all night," Alice asked. I shrugged and headed toward my room. "I was hunting. I didn't want to talk to anyone," I stated.

"Edward wait I have to tell you something!" Alice called when I was half way up the stairs.

"You know Alice I really just don't want to hear it. Everything you tell me just ends up being bad news. How many times have I heard you say those words and then sink deeper into depression!"

"Edward this is important! More so than anything I have ever said before," Alice said with wide eyes. Her thoughts were noisy and she had many at the same time. It was hard to read but for the first time I didn't think Alice was blocking me out on purpose.

"Alice what's wrong?" I asked and she looked at me with worried eyes. Those eyes I had grown to fear.

"Edward it's about Bella," she said and I stiffened. "I'd rather not hear anything about her anymore," I said and made my way to my room. I plopped myself on the sofa until I heard the door swing open.

"This is about her safety," Alice said and I stood up.

"What about it?"

"She was going to get on a plane back to the states. She can _not_ get on that plane, Edward!" Alice said I was instantly alert.

"Why?"

"Edward, Bella can not get on that plane because it doesn't have a great chance of getting there in one piece" Alice shouted and I was already on my feet.

"What time does the plane leave?" I asked as I looked at my wrist watch.

"Six."

"Damn it Alice. I'm not gonna make it," I said and dashed out the door before she could tell me anything more.

I had fifteen minutes to find her and convince her that she shouldn't get on. All I could do was hope I could make it on time.

I came to the building where she lived and made my way inside. I found the door that had her and Alex's scent and knocked on it.

There was no answer.

I turned the knob and was surprise to find the door unlocked. Where they in a hurry to leave or will they still here?

I looked around the apartment and found it empty.

Damn it they had left. I had to get to the airport and fast.

Or else everything that ever meant anything to me would be gone forever and I wouldn't be able to save her this time. But with any luck I would catch her in time.

There was just one problem.

Luck was never on my side.

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**Wow I never thought I would be good at drama but I guess I am because I keep putting twist and turns in this story that surprise even me. And the review response I get is outrageous. So thanks my lovely reviewers and this chapter goes to all of those who stuck with me and the story. Thank you. Okay well review and I will post a new chapter. Yesterday I didn't cuz I had to spend The 4****th**** of July with family but I have time now so HAPPY belated FOURTH OF JULY! **

**Lots of love Twilightholic-Tanya**


	7. Immortal Visitor

**Wait!! Do not kill me because I have a very good reason on why I have not updated. See I was planning on updating Sunday but my mom wanted to go visit my grandma so I had to go of course. While I was visiting I did not have computer access. Anyway while my mom was getting ready to leave that night my aunt. Asked if I could stay with her. I said yes because I hate staying at my house. It is boring. My mom said okay and so I spent Monday at my grandma's house with my aunt. I was suppose to go home with my aunt to Rockford and then she was going to drop me off tomorrow, but my aunt said it was easier if she dropped me off at my house on her way home. So I am back a day early. And if you just read my long explanation I am sure you are story starved so on with the story!**

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To himself everyone is immortal; he may know that he is going to die, but he can never know that he is dead. --Samuel Butler

I had to get to the airport and fast. I hoped with all my heart that I would make it. When I had finally made it inside I went quickly to check which flights had taken off.

As I scanned the charts looking for Bella's flight I finally came to see it was gone. No! Damn it I can't be too late.

I felt dazed and confused.

_Edward_

I turned to see Alice looking at me with sad eyes. She placed a hand on my shoulder and I shook her off. "Please tell me I'm not too late," I said and Alice looked away.

_I wish I could but then I would be lying_

"No damn it Alice this can't be the end for her. She just can't have it done like that. She deserved so much better," I said as I tried my best to fight back my pain. If I could cry I know I would be.

"Edward I'm so sorry," Alice whispered and I glared at her.

"You can't pick up anything more. You can't se ahead," I asked harshly. "Edward I'd rather not see the outcome of the crash," she said and cringed. I nodded understanding.

She was gone.

The worst part was I never got to tell her how much I loved her.

"Alice she can't be gone. I never even got the chance to tell her how much she meant to me. I never got to tell her how much I still love her and she will never know now," I said and Alice laid her head on my arm.

"Edward!" a voice called and I turned to see her.

Bella was standing staring at me with a cup of coffee in her hands.

Bella.

With out giving much thought to what I was doing I scooped her up in a hug and she dropped her coffee in surprise.

"Edward what's is up with you?" she asked as she pushed away from me. Then a thought occurred to me.

"Bella, where is Alex?" I said the words slowly and Bella seemed to narrow her eyes in suspicion. "He left to the states to see his dad. I was going to go but decided it would be better to stay at the last minute," she said and my eyes widened. I was filled with grief and relief and I had no idea how the two completely opposite emotions could merge into one.

"Bella Alex went on the plane?" I asked and she nodded. "Why do you want to know? Edward why are you even here?" she asked her and I wasn't sure if I should tell her. But Bella deserved to know. "Bella I didn't want you on that plane because…" I trailed off and she looked at me worried.

"What Edward?" she asked and I could already hear her voice choke up.

I turned to see Alice staring at us and watched as she took steps closer. Bella looked at her and her eyes widened when she realized who it was.

"Alice…" Bella breathed and then looked up at me. Her eyes were filled with tears and I could tell she was figuring it out. "Bella, the plane isn't going to make it across safely" Alice whispered and Bella stood shocked her eyes darting to Alice and then back at me.

"No," she groaned and I could hear the tears.

"No!" she shouted and heads turned our way. She leaned into me and I could feel her tears soaking up my shirt. "No Please god no," she groaned and I brought her into a hug.

I led her to a couple of chairs and sat her down as she made her grip on me tighter. Her sobs were heavy and she shook with every one of them. "I'm so sorry Bella," I whispered against her head.

I felt grief for her and amazingly I still felt jealousy as she sobbed for the man she loved. I could tell Bella did really love him and I felt bad for feeling jealousy but I couldn't help it.

All I could do now was hold Bella as she cried.

BPOV

Things couldn't have happened to him. He wasn't supposed to go that way. He had a future set out for him and a whole life. He was supposed to be happy and have kids and a nice house.

The more I thought about these things the sadder I grew, but as I pictured the life he would never have I didn't see myself in it.

I clung on to Edward with all my strength afraid if I let go I would lose myself. But my grip became lighter mad my lids became heavier and before I knew it I was drowning in the cold water of unconsciousness.

o.0.o.0.o.0

"Alice will she be okay?" I heard a soft voice asked and I felt cool fingers on my forehead. "Yea, she's coming to," Alice said and my eyes fluttered. I opened them and looked around. I was in my apartment but how did…

I didn't matter anymore. I no longer wanted answers. Maybe Edward was right. Maybe it was better to not know all the answers after all ignorance is bliss.

I was in my bed and Edward sat on it stroking my forehead. "How are you doing?" he asked and gave a sad smile. Alice was standing behind him.

I turned away from both of then and stared at the wall. "I feel like I could puke at any moment and my whole world just came cashing down," I said not able to describe exactly how I felt.

Edward sighed and I looked at him. His eyes were close and he looked as though he could be sleeping. He looked like the perfect picture of calm. Had Edward gotten enough sleep? Why did he always seem to have bags under his eyes? They were dark now.

He opened his eyes slowly as he looked at me and I could see pain and grief in his dark god eyes.

"You have messages from his family. We didn't pick up but we heard them. I don't think they know anything because they just wanted to know when he will be getting back." Edward said and I nodded. He smiled again and lifted himself from the bed.

"I truly am sorry," he said and I glanced at Alice. Her eyes were far away and I wondered if she could be having another vision. I propped myself on my elbows and Edward turned to see what I was looking at. He glanced at Alice and then gave her shoulder a nudge.

She blinked and then looked back at me.

"I have to go, but I truly am sorry Bella," she said and walked out of the room.

"If you ever need anything call me," Edward said and gave me a piece of paper. I took it in my hand and I knew it was his number. I was still confused n what had just happened.

"Good bye," he whispered and then followed his sister out. I stared at the doorway stunned. Had this really happened?

Maybe it hadn't happen at all and I was just dreaming. That could work, or maybe they had decided to play a cruel joke n me but some how deep down I knew that they wouldn't have done that and I was very much awake.

I was living a nightmare.

And it all seemed to begin when Edward gave me that letter.

EPOV

It had been three weeks and I still had spoken to Bella. She had not call and I figured that she was doing well. The crash of the plane was all over the news and it nearly killed all the passengers.

What seemed to make me alert was that bodies had gone missing. People who had boarded the flight but no one found there body.

There were five in total and Alex was one of them.

No one could figure out what happened to them. This had my nerves on end. I hadn't heard from Bella but I knew that the family had no hope. They figured Alex was dead.

So even as the thoughts circled in my head I sat on my piano bench and my fingers rested on the keys. I still could not come up with and ending to the song I had started nearly a month ago. It was horrible.

"Edward?" I heard Alice call from the living room. I slowly got up and made my way over.

"Yes?" I asked. She looked at me with worried eyes and I saw a face in her thoughts. It was a face I thought I would never see again.

She was standing by the door with her hand on the knob. "We have a visitor," she said and I could hear a hint of panic in it. She opened the door and I was stunned. Standing on the door step was someone I thought I would never see again and especially not like this.

I was shocked as I examined our visitor. You could have knocked me down with a feather.

Their eyes were a crimson red and there face and skin were as white as the newly fallen snow. There skinned glittered because of the sun we had today and there face was a mask of sadness.

Standing at the door was the last person I wanted to see like this.

Standing at the door was a newborn Vampire.

Standing at the door was Alex.

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**Ohh I bet none of you saw that coming! Okay so you're all wondering what's gonna happen next and if you want to know you have to review. I hoped you like it. Again sorry I was late on the update. God it feels good to be home. I missed it so much.**

**Thank you for all the lovely reviews and for all the people who bother to read and review and surprisingly like my story I will give you a next chapter sneak peek. **

**SNEAK PEEK: **_"Edward, he did mean it at the time but now he changed his mind. You have to find him and fast or—"but I didn't want to know the rest. I knew what would happen and Alice was right. I needed to find him._

**Yeah that is all you get. Remember review and I will give you a faster update. **

**lots of love Twilightholic-Tanya**

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	8. Broken Promise

**Okay so I am really happy with the reviews I got and to thank each and every one of you I will post a new chapter. Okay so a reviewer asked me this and I couldn't get back to her**

**Yes I do post quotes that I think fit the chapter on the beginning. Just stuff I find that I think would go nicely to describe the chapter is all.**

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_I know too well the poison and the sting of things too sweet. - Adelaide Proctor _

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"What…" I couldn't speak. I was too stunned.

"You're the only one that can help me. I have no idea what became of me," Alex said as he looked at his glittering hands.

"Come in," Alice said softly and Alex walked into the house. I stared at him wondering what happened. "Why don't you take a seat and tell us what happened," Alice said and he nodded as he made his way over to the couch.

I followed and took a seat myself.

Alex began to tell us of the crash and how he had lost all consciousness. He remembered being lit on fire and it was painful.

"I don't know what happened. It felt as though every part of me was on fire and I couldn't make it stop. When I awoke and looked around I was in the middle of what looked like a forest. No one was around and I was alone," he went on.

"What about the others? There were five missing bodies what happened to the others," I mumbled to myself. "I think who ever bit him was just feeding. There might have been more than one and decided to quench there thirst. Maybe they thought they drained him but it didn't happen. It could have been an accident to transform him. Perhaps when they realized what they did they ran," Alice said and I nodded.

"Perhaps," I said again.

Alex's thoughts were confused and scared. "I want to know what happened to me. I wake up and I feel twice as strong and my senses work overtime. I can smell things a mile away. I can hear things so quietly they don't make a sound. I can see in a pitch black space. _I don't have to breathe_," he rambled.

"Alice is Carlisle home?" I asked knowing he would do a much better job at explaining. Alice shook he head and I sighed.

"Alex have you hunted?" I asked noticing for the first time just how red his eyes were. "I…uh…" I could already see in his mind the girl who he had attacked.

"Alex do you have any idea of what you are?" I asked and he looked up at me.

"A monster," he said and I sighed once again. "Only if you chose that way of life. The way you hunted the girl. But there are other ways to quench your thirst. Maybe not as satisfying but it works. Alex we are vampires" I said slowly and his eyes grew.

"I…how?" he said. He wanted to deny it but his memory of what he did to the girl flashed in his mind yet again. I could see it and I cringed against it. "Will you please not think of that anymore?" I asked and he looked at me confusion in his eyes.

I looked at Alice and we knew what we had to do.

We began to explain to him everything there was to know about vampires.

_(Again just gonna skip all this cuz you know everything about Twilight vampires)_

"I never asked for this! I don't want it" he growled when we finished telling him.

"Sorry but you can't take it back," I said and he glowered at me.

"You think I asked for this? I never wanted it either. I wanted to live a normal human life but if I wasn't turned I would have died!"

Then a face came into his memory and I froze. "Leave her alone Alex! You cannot what so ever go and look for her," I warned. "Why not! You spent time with her," Alex argued. "Yes but I have self control. You don't, you're still a newborn. Do you not remember what happened to the girl you came across," I shouted and Alex looked away.

"How does Bella even know you?"

"Because she met me as a human," I said and a memory flashed in his mind.

"_He was someone I dated in high school. A foster child and he had a bad record. Charlie didn't approve of him and we had to date in secret. To be honest I thought he was going to be the one I met when I walked down the aisle. But he moved away and forgot about me. I never saw him again,"_

_Is that you then? You're her first love?_

I swallowed hard at the words Bella had spoken. "Yes I guess I am. I was in an accident and I had to leave her alone or I would have killed her. It was the hardest thing for me to do but I did it anyway. I did it because I loved her and if she love her you will leave her alone!" I growled and he looked at me with frightful eyes.

"I'll leave her alone. I won't go near her I promise," he sighed and I glanced at Alice.

She lifted her chin and her eyes seemed to gloss over. She was going into a vision. Alex was keeping to his word. He wasn't going to go near her.

"You're welcome to stay here for as long as you like," I offered and Alex shook his head.

"I can't stay in London knowing she's here and not being able to do anything about it. I'll go back to the states and follow your example. Well I'll try at least." He sighed.

"How did you get here Alex?" Alice asked. "I swam," was he simple reply.

I smiled and shook my head. "Smart move," I said and he broke out a smile.

"Well I better get going. "And I won't go near her. Not if it means she could get hurt," Alex said and I nodded. He wasn't lying and I could tell his words were sincere.

I nodded and just as suddenly as he came he left. I looked at Alice with worried eyes and she just shrugged.

"He'll make it to the states but I can't see anything other than that," she said and I nodded once again. I walked toward the door and she placed a hand on my arm. "Where are you going?"

"Hunting…it's been a while since I have," I said and she nodded as she let me go.

o.0.o.0.o.0

When I came back I went straight to my room not wanting to deal with anyone for a while. The shock of what had happen today still did not seem to wear off.

"Edward we have a problem" Alice said as she barged into my room. I wanted to groan. When didn't we have a problem that led to just another problem?

"What is it Alice?" I asked and she looked frightful. "It's about Alex,"

"What about him!"

"He's going after Bella!"

"What? He can't he promised he wouldn't go after her!"

"Edward, he did mean it at the time but now he changed his mind. You have to find him and fast or—"but I didn't want to know the rest. I knew what would happen and Alice was right. I needed to find him.

_(Wouldn't it be mean if I just left it like that? But I'm not mean so I didn't)_

BPOV

As I took my normal evening walks I couldn't help but feel like something wasn't right.

The streets were dark and quiet and I suddenly felt as if I was really just alone.

It had been three weeks since I had gotten the news of Alex's death and I was still in mourning. I could sleep at night or even stay in the house. It just felt too much like him. Many times I picked up the phone and dialed a number that I was sure would bring happiness back into my life but I never made the call.

I felt as though I didn't deserve happiness but once again my phone was out and the number I wasn't suppose to dial was on the screen. All I had to do was press send and I would hear his voice.

Soft and smooth, sweet and alluring, just his voice could make you go week in the knees and his face would make your heart stop all together.

Then I felt a cold gust of wind and saw something move from the corner of my eye.

I lifted my head and looked around. No one was out here. The hairs on the back of my neck seemed to rise and I shivered sending Goosebumps down my arms.

Something wasn't right. I continued to look around my surroundings and I couldn't seem to find a way to make my feet move. Then I caught the shadow again and turned to look.

I could make out a silhouette in the distance and as it came closer I could make out who it was.

Alex?

My phone dropped out of my hands and to the ground as I stared at the creature coming closer and closer.

EPOV

I had to brainstorm and think where Bella would be at this hour. If I made the wrong choice and went there Alex would get to her first.

Then my phone vibrated and I thought it would be Alice giving me more information.

But it wasn't. it wasn't a number I recognized but I answered anyway.

"Hello?"

There was no answer on the other line accept for static sounds. I should have hung up the phone but something told me not to. Something to told me to keep listening.

"Alex?" I heard a soft voice asked quietly and everyone of my muscles stiffened. It was Bella.

I heard a scream then the line went dead. My stomach clenched and I suddenly felt nauseous.

Alex had gotten to her, first.

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**Okay I know what you're thinking about and I could tell you right this moment it is not what you think. But you have to read more to find out. Anyways thanks for all the wonderful reviews peoples I love them and I really hope I get as many for this chapter. I love the response for it really I mean I posted it and already I had like 20 reviews. Loved it and if your keep giving me lots like that than I will like update everyday. Thanks so much for reading.**

**Lots of love Twilightholic-Tanya**


	9. Loving Surprise

**Okay the chapter you all been waiting for! Bella will find out everything in this chapter. How? Well you'll just have to read to find out. ENJOY!**

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_Love is…coming to her rescue.- comic strip (by Kim Casali)_

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BPOV

I was backed against a building wall watching Alex come near me. This was not the Alex I knew. His eyes were blood red and smoldering. They gave me a look that a snake might give a bird with a broken wing.

_(Okay I have seen snake's hunt cuz my nephew owns one and let me tell you. there eyes are creepy when there about to attack)_

His skin was white as snow and I couldn't help but think of Edward. Alex in a way looked like Edward.

They had taken the same changes. Alex's beautiful blue eyes were gone and replaced with freighting red ones. His skin looked like it belonged on a corpse and he was unmistakably more beautiful. My heart thumped and my finger began to shake. My stomch felt like a knot and I felt like I might vomit at any moment. The feeling that crawled in my veins was undoubtedly fear.

But why was I afraid of Alex? I shouldn't be afraid of Alex! I should have been embracing him, but my instincts told me other wise and they told me to get as far away from him as possible.

His eyes were wild as he stared at me.

Then like a bolt of lightening he was throwing himself at me. I closed my eyes and flinched waiting for the impact but it never came. I opened my eyes slightly and saw the only person in the world I wanted to see.

Edward!

But something wasn't quite right. Alex was thrashing and fighting against Edward's hold. Why was Edward holding him back?

I saw Edward's lips move but I heard no sound, just the small and quick movements of his lips.

Alex froze and closed his eyes as he tried to calm down. He was still wriggling in Edwards grip but he wasn't trying as hard to get free. "Bella, I need you to get away and now. I don't care where you go just go!" He growled and I stared at him.

I think I would have listen to him if I wasn't frozen in place my fear and shock. "Bella please," he begged and all I could do was blink. Why couldn't I move?

"Take him away. I'll handle her," Edward mumbled and I became even more confused before I saw Alice and Jasper come around a corner and headed straight for Alex.

My hands shook even more at the bizarre situation I was in.

Then I felt as though a fog came over me and before I knew it was sinking toward the concrete.

_(Jasper did not have any part in that. Bella simply fainted) _

EPOV

I released Alex as Alice and Jasper took a hold of him and I looked at Bella. She was falling. I quickly caught her before she could make contact with the ground and picked her up in my arms. "Take him where he could get a fresh breath. Right now all he smells is her. He's relaying too much on instincts," I explained and Alice nodded as Jasper calmed him down.

I took Bella to her apartment and laid her on her bed. I sat on the edge and watched her. I brushed her hair away from her face and sighed. If I just left now she would think of it as a bad nightmare and forget about everything.

As much as I wanted to stay I knew it was better to leave. I leaned in and kissed her forehead softly and then stood to walk out but as I did I heard her mumble my name.

"Edward,"

Damn she was up. I turned slowly to see her still asleep. She turned and I heard my name once more. Was she having a dream about me?

I smiled a sad smile at the dreams she should have about me. I doubt they could be called dreams at all but as I stared at her face I took note that she was completely at peace. She had a faint smile playing on her lips and would sigh every now and then.

Even though I should have left I couldn't. I wanted to be there when she woke and I wanted to explain everything to her. She deserved to know everything because frankly she had been living in mystery for far too long.

And so I waited anxiously as she awoke and began to stir.

BPOV

My head was pounding and I awoke from a dream and nightmare combined into one.

My eyes fluttered open and I sat up slowly. I looked around the small room and my eyes froze over someone I thought I had said goodbye to.

"Edward?" I croaked and tilted my head in question.

He smiled. "Do you know someone else who looks like me?" he joked and I remembered those words. Those were the words he told me when he had taken me to meet the Cullen's. When he had visited my house. When I had been happy.

"No I don't," I shot back at him and he laughed.

"I remember that day like it was yesterday," he mumbled quietly and I didn't speak. Hopefully he would tell me what I wanted to hear. "That was the day that changed my life forever, that was the last time I was truly happy," he sighed and I felt my throat clog.

"Edward I—" I started but was cut off.

"Bella I know you want explanations and you're right. I run away too much. But maybe it was because that was the way I always dealt with problems. The way I was taught. You have to remember I never had a childhood like most kids did.

"I was a trouble maker and when the parents I was with couldn't handle it anymore they sent me away. They ran away from me instead of trying to fix the problem. So I apologize for what I have done but I just don't always know how to fix a problem," he sighed and I was speechless.

Edward got up from the chair he was sitting in and came to sit on the bed. He sat on the edge careful to avoid my legs and took my hand.

"I'm done running away," he said and sighed. "You're going to tell me? Everything?" I asked and he nodded but now I was unsure on whether or not I wanted to hear it.

I sighed preparing myself for whatever he had and then he began to explain.

_(Okay so I really hope I won't have to put the explanation cuz then that is like repeating the whole story. You know what is happening!)_

EPOV

I gulped when I finished telling her and she looked at me with pure shock in her eyes.

She ran a hand through her hair and sighed.

"How can that be? Vampires are a child tale? There not suppose to be real!" she shouted and I flinched. "I didn't think they were either but I was proven wrong wasn't I?" I said and she stared me over. I expected her to run or scream or anything along the lines. Any normal person would in finding out there was a monster in there home but then again since when was Bella normal?

"So you left me to protect me? You never stopped loving me?" she said and I laughed. She looked confused and I took her hand into mine while I played with her fingers.

"No I never stopped loving you. That letter was the hardest thing I had to do! But I knew it would be better if you just forgot about me. Thought I was just a jerk and hopefully you would get over me faster," I explained and she laughed.

"Just because I thought you were a jerk didn't help me to get over you faster. I loved you. You just can't mend a broken heart with a few words," she said and I nodded. "I still love you," I said and she smiled.

"Well maybe with a few words and actions," she said and placed a hand on my cheek. She leaned in closer and I made sure not to breathe.

I swallowed and tried to forget just how tempting she smelled. "Edward?" she whispered and I opened my eyes not realizing I had closed them.

She was staring into my eyes with a feeling I still wasn't sure she should have for me but still made my stomach turn. She was staring at me with love.

"Bella I—" I said but was cut off because she had placed her lips to mine.

I reacted. I couldn't help it. My hands moved to her face and I kissed her back making sure not to breathe.

Her lips were soft and sweet and they had not changed since I last kissed them. I felt like this was our real first kiss after six years. She parted her lips and I could feel her warm breath on my lips and I knew it had gone too far.

I pulled away softly and stared at her. Now I had come to the point where I had no idea what to do!

"Bella you have no idea how hard it was for six years to ignore you and then you come storming back into my life and you turned it upside down just like you did last time but I can never get myself to regret it," I said with a sad smile.

"Edward I want to be with you" she said and took my hand.

"Bella I don't think that such a good idea," I said and her eyes dimmed. She swallowed and looked away. She looked down and I could see tears slowly falling down her cheeks.

"Edward just because you're not human doesn't mean I stopped loving you," she said her eyes fierce as she stared at me. "I know but Bella it would never work out between us. I want you to have a human life and be happy," he said and she crossed her arms around her chest.

"Edward after all these years, do you still love me?"

"You have no idea how much but—"

"Then shouldn't I get what _I_ want?" she asked and I narrowed my eyes at her.

"Depending on what it is?"

"I want to be like you," she said and I stiffened. "Absolutely not!" I growled.

"Why?"

"Because I'm not going to change you into something you shouldn't be! You deserve to have the wedding you wanted and the nice house and a job and kids! I will not take that away from you just so you can be with me" I shouted and she looked taken back.

I could see tears leak down her cheeks and she sighed.

"What if I didn't want to be with you? What if I wanted to be with Alex?" she asked and I froze.

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**Okay so if you still stick with me after this chapter then well thanks but remember what I promised. I promised a happy ending and Edward and Bella will be together so stick around to find out what happens.**

**Lots of love Twilightholic-Tanya **


	10. One Problem

Maybe You Should

**Okay hold off the pitch forks and torches because I have something to say. Yes I had abandoned this story for a while but that is because I had writers block on it. Now I really didn't expect that to happen but it did. I had a chapter planned but if I posted it, it would have ended the story and I don't want to give up on it just yet. **

**So yes I apologized for that and I have to say yes I will be wrapping up the story but I have no idea how many chapters I have planned. **

**Please forgive me but when I get writers block there is no forcing a story out of me because it will suck. So I let my mind wonder to other idea until I get one for this story and wa-la it worked so yea I have a few ideas for this story so if you stuck around and read that then I believe your starving for a story. Let the story begin!**

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_"It's hard to tell your mind to stop loving someone if your heart still does."_

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I turned my head away from her and sighed. "I won't change you. I don't think Alex would be too pleased if you gave up everything to be with him either," I said knowing Alex loved her like I did. Maybe not as strongly but he loved her and I knew he wouldn't allow her to give it all up to share the nightmare he lived now.

"Unbelievable you find an answer to everything don't you!" she snapped and I flinched at the sound of her voice.

"Not true," I said and stood up. The blood rushing to her face was becoming a bit unbearable. I walked toward her window and opened it letting the cold air rush at me, clearing my head.

"Yes it is true. No matter what I come up with you're just going to take two steps ahead of me and block it before I could continue. _It's not fair_!"

"No, what's not fair is having your life ripped from your hands and having to give up everything you ever hoped for only to be replaced with a torturous existence. It's not fair to live watching others have what they want and having others actually succeeding with there future while you have to live forever as a monster. And do you really want to know what's not fair! What's not fair is _finally_ having something to live for and then not having a life!" I snapped back my temper rising.

I turned toward Bella now and her face was flushed tears at her eyes.

Her eyes glinted with anger and I realized this was not going to a simple argument.

"Well I'm sorry that had to happen, but what I find is stupid is _finally_ having the chance to fix that and just throwing it away! You have no idea how much time I wished I could be with you no matter the price and I finally get that chance and I'm willing to pay it and all of a sudden you're saying no. It makes me wonder if you really ever loved me," she said and stood up as she left the room.

I sighed and just glanced out the window. There was no easy way with her. She was just as stubborn and even though it looked like she may have changed it suddenly occurred to me that she hadn't. She was the same girl I knew and the same girl who loved me.

Why was I reluctant to change her?

Answers came at me from left to right and I knew it was better if I just didn't.

_But if Bella wanted it…then it wouldn't be taking her life from her_

No!

I wouldn't do it. I made my way to the kitchen where Bella was drinking a cup of coffee. She was sitting down looking exhausted.

I sat down next to her and slowly traced a hand under her eyes. "You haven't been getting much sleep have you?" I asked softly and she shook her head. "It hasn't been all too great for me," she sighed and placed her coffee on the table as she moved to sit in my lap.

I held her just wanting to comfort her. When her eye lids began to droop I picked her up and walked back to the bed room where I placed her on the bed and made a move to leave but she grabbed my shirt and held me down.

"Stay with me?" she begged silently and I nodded.

I held her in my arms as she slept and I began to hum. I began to hum the soft melody that I had started over a month ago. The melody that ceased to have an ending.

But when I reached the part that would cut off the music I kept going. Bella's heart beat slowed and steadied and I finished the song. It finally had an ending.

Slowly so I wouldn't wake her, I unwrapped my arms from Bella and climbed out the bed. I had to talk to Alice.

--

"Where is he?" I asked when I entered the living room to see Alice sitting in the couch reading something.

"Jasper and Emmett took him hunting. They said it would be easier to think if he wasn't thirsty. He needs to hunt anyway, he's a newborn." She said as she flipped the page of a book.

"Where are the others?"

"Esme is somewhere upstairs and Rosalie is in her room. Carlisle is at the hospital working a double," she said and closed the book she was reading and put it aside and turned to look at me.

I shot a glance at the book she was reading. I snorted and took a seat as I studied the cover.

"I didn't even know we had this book in the house," I said and flipped through the pages.

"I came across it and was curious. It is a very interesting novel," she said and smiled as I look through the cover. "Have you read it?" she asked and I nodded. "Yes and I found it…" I couldn't muster up an adjective to describe the novel.

"Interesting," Alice supplied and I wrinkled my nose as I place the book aside. "I suppose but really turning to ash in the sun," I said and I rolled my eyes as she giggled.

"Well some facts are right. But yes it is ridiculous. Sleeping in coffins…" she said in the same tone I had. I chuckled and sighed.

_Interview with the Vampire_…

"But I guess I could see Luis's side much better than I ever thought I would. I mean even as a human I could relate somewhat but now I can relate in a way I never thought possible," I sighed as my fingers slowly traced the cover of the book.

"Hmm…so I suppose. Are you done beating around the bush?"

Of course Alice would know why I was here. I had almost forgotten she could see ahead of time but then again that was Alice. She lived in the future instead of the here and now. It was better than how I lived. I lived in the past. But maybe that could change…

"I wanted to ask you something?" I said as I ran a hand through my hair.

I turned to look at Alice and met her golden topaz gaze. I sighed as I remembered her light brown eyes that had the same affect.

"Why did you want to change?" I managed and looked away to stare at nothing and concentrate on my thoughts.

_It was hard for me. You of all people knew that. I had these strange visions and was accused more than once that I was crazy!_ Her thoughts rang through my head.

"But you weren't!" I said and gazed at her. Suddenly I saw my human self in her eyes.

My green eyes intense and my face in a stern expression. My cheeks flushed and my twinkling with emotion. I was confused on why she would be thinking of me like that.

"I miss the way you use to look at me. You had no idea how…warming your eyes were. I could look in them and be so sure of myself. I could believe everything you told me. I find it funny you still have the crazy affect on me. I guess it's just you," she said and slightly nudged my shoulder.

She sighed and continued, "I knew I wasn't crazy. I told myself over and over again that they just didn't understand. They didn't see what I saw. They didn't know. It got harder and harder to believe in myself after being put down so many times. You were the only person that understood me. That _believed _me."

"Then you had one life changing vision," I muttered remembering that day in my head like it happened only a few hours ago.

"Yes, I saw you and Carlisle. My vision did come true in the end though. But once I saw that I went to Carlisle. I told him what I saw and he explained everything to me. He told me what they were. He explained _everything_. Then he told about how certain vampires had powers or special abilities.

"So I thought if I was changed, well maybe I would be able to control my visions. Maybe I could actually feel like a sane person instead of living the rest of my life believing I was crazy and be put in…" she didn't finished. She shuttered and looked away.

"But you never feel any regret? You never feel like perhaps you made the wrong choice? I mean doesn't it bother you, that you and Jasper would never be able to have a future together?" I questioned.

Alice chuckled and shook her head.

"No I don't feel any regrets. This was what I wanted and I got it. I love being me and having this life. The only regret I have is taking away your life. Jasper and I do have a future. We will always have a future. Granted we can't grow old and have children but we love each other and that's all we need, is each other. Though what you decide to do with Bella is completely up to you. I will tell you though that Bella won't regret her decision," Alice said and patted my lap as she got up and left the room.

Bella might not regret it but how would I feel? How would I feel taking away her human life to do a horribly selfish act?

Maybe I wouldn't feel too bad. I would get Bella and I was tired of living without her. I had the chance to have her, so shouldn't I take it?

I was tired of never having what I wanted! Maybe it was time to spoil myself. Didn't I deserve that much? But did Bella?

"Ugh!" I groaned as I lifted myself from the sofa and made my way over to the piano. I sat down and continued the melody that I had finally came up with an end to.

The music was peaceful and an easy way to escape my thoughts. I was thrilled when I finally came to the part I use to get stuck on and play all the way through.

When it came to a finish I heard the front door open and an image flashed through my head.

Alex!

What about him?

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**Yay! I finally posted this chapter! Trust me the past few days were annoying because I kept trying to get something down and I just couldn't come up with anything but I finally have. So how do you like? Good/ bad?**

**Well please review and I'll update. NO MORE WRITERS BLOCK! So I'll have a chapter up soon promise! Review for me!**

**Lots of love Twilightholic-Tanya**


	11. Dangerous Thoughts

**W.O.W! Yes I just went to see the movie The Dark Knight and let me tell ya, it was friggin AWESOME! It will not disappoint so you should see it if you haven't already. Also I have seen the preview for Twilight! I all most jumped out of my seat when I saw it. But I am still really worried about it. I don't really like the whole idea of turning Twilight into a movie so yea I am a protestor but I am going to go see it also. I want to see what they messed up. Anyway that was all I had to say so on with the story!**

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_Only in the agony of parting do we look into the depths of love. - George Eliot_

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"Edward I am so sorry," Alex apologized as he rushed toward me. I thought if I saw him I would be angry surprisingly I was not. But yet I was annoyed.

I turned toward him my back toward the piano. "You lied to me Alex and you nearly killed her. I told you to stay away from her! It was for her safety!" I growled and tried to keep my annoyance from growing into full blown anger. I knew how bad my anger could get.

"I couldn't help myself. I had to see her before I left and I just couldn't leave without seeing her. But her sent caught me off guard. It was amazing and I couldn't control myself," he explained while sinking to the ground. He sat down and leaned his head on the wall behind him.

I could see his thoughts. I could see he wanted to make sure she was okay and how he lost control. How the smell hit him and sent his instincts on fire.

"Her smell is amazing but that doesn't make it okay!" I scolded.

"Don't you think I know that? I was stupid I should have listen but I didn't. How many times can I say I'm sorry!" he snapped back at me and I looked away from him.

He was really starting my temper.

I lifted myself from the bench and made my way to the front door but Alex followed.

"Where are you going?" he asked when my hand touched the door knob.

"Bella will be waking up soon. I have to be there when she does," I answered and opened the door but Alex put a hand on my shoulder. "Why are you going to see her?" he asked his voice dark.

"Because you gave her quite a fright. I mean look at you. Your eyes our blood red and your skin is as white as the first snow of the season! You don't think she noticed the difference, you don't think she noticed the crazy look in your eyes!" I shouted as I turned around to look at him. He turned his head away from my gaze and I could tell he felt regret for his actions, but I just didn't leave it like that.

He had set off my anger and there was no going back.

"If you think she didn't notice then you really don't know her," I growled and Alex's eyes looked straight at mine with a cold look.

"Don't you dare tell me what I know and don't know about her! I was the one who lived and cared for her the past three years while you were where? While you left her broken and damaged! Why you treated her like a piece of—"

"No I never did! If I had the choice I wouldn't have left her for a second. It was either this or death for me so don't go there. I loved her more than you ever will!" I shouted back at him and he looked down as he shook his head.

_Loved. Does that mean your feelings have changed?_

His words hit me like a whip. Powerful and painful. I glared at him and I could see he was scared. I could see the fear in his mind and eyes. I could sense how scared he was and he had every right to be.

"No, they haven't and they never will. I love Bella more than words can say. I loved her enough to not make the same stupid mistake you just made and risk her life. I loved her enough to _give her up_. But you don't love Bella that way and you never will. In your mind you can't imagine a world without her. You can never give her up! So in truth I love her more than you ever can! I was wrong when I told Bella; she would find somebody who deserved her love because frankly she never did," I said in the calmest voice I had ever used but I knew it was because I wasn't calm.

I could see myself through Alex's vision and I was deathly frightening.

My stance, my facial expression, my voice, they all showed I was at peace. But my eyes are what made the biggest difference. My eyes turned darker with every word I uttered and they looked at him in one way: murder.

Alex then took a difference stance. His thoughts flashed to Bella and sinking his teeth into her neck, and then watching her as she transformed. He imagined a future with her. He imagined being with her and having her kiss him and love him, in a way I didn't like.

Bella was mine. Never before did I ever think of having someone being yours but the way I felt with Bella was different. I felt possessive. She was mine and he had no right to think about doing those things to her. Any of them.

I was no longer in check.

My hand flew to his throat and I pushed him against the wall. I lifted his feet off the ground and stared at his cold eyes.

"If you ever even consider following through on that plan I will make sure you never ever lay eyes on her again. I will make sure you lay eyes on nothing but the deepest pit of hell where you belong!" I growled but he simply smiled.

"You wouldn't do that to Bella, now would you?" he said his voice horse due to where I held him.

I threw him on the ground to see his body leave a dent on the floor. I leaned down and griped his collar as I brought his face closer to mine. "You underestimate me. I'll warn you once and only once. Don't!" I spat and dropped him as I straightened up.

He picked himself up from the ground and he stared at me terrified. Mentally I smiled.

_I'm stronger than you Cullen. What makes you so sure of yourself?_ I heard his thoughts muttered.

"Because I have advantages," I said with smile as I turned my back to him and placed a foot out the door.

"When I get back I don't want you to be here!" I warned and left without another look or word.

When I entered Bella's room she was still fast asleep. I smiled and sat at the edge of the bed and leaned over her. I pushed her hair away from her face and took in her face. If I changed her I wouldn't see her like this again. I wouldn't see the deep brown eyes I fell in love with.

I wouldn't ever see her blush and I wouldn't see her tears. I wouldn't feel the need to protect her.

I sighed and placed my elbows on my knees as I buried my face in my hands.

I wanted to change Bella, but there were so many reasons not to. There were so many reasons to have her live as a human.

What I needed was time! I sighed as I thought about all the time wasted.

Bella's steady heart beat increased and I smelled her blood as it rushed to her face. I could imagine she was blushing.

Still I did not look up. I felt her place a hand on my back and then felt her as she leaned her forehead against my shoulder.

"A penny for your thoughts," she teased and I laughed.

"What's so funny?" she asked and I realized I never told her about my 'special abilities'. I guess it just didn't come to mind.

"I was just thinking…how I get to have thoughts for free," I muttered and leaned back so I lying on the bed.

Bella kneeled at my side looking confused. "What do you mean?" she asked and I felt another smile lit my face.

I gave her a secretive glance. "You can figure it out. After all you are the perspective one," I teased and watch as her face burrowed in confusion.

"That's not fair there aren't enough clues," she muttered as she tried to go over what I had told her.

"Just think maybe it'll come to you," I supplied and watched as her brows furrow.

"Okay well when I said, 'a penny for your thoughts' you laughed and said you get them for free, so…" she looked at me for a second and then her eyes lit.

"You can't! Can you?" she asked and I merely smiled. "Well if your referring to reading people's mind then yes I can!" I said with a smile and her eyes turned quickly to surprise, shock, and then anger.

I sighed waiting to hear what she had to say. "You didn't tell me anything! So all this time you've been knowing my thoughts!" she scolded and smacked my arm.

"No, I haven't. I can't read your mind. You're not a normal person," I teased and watch as relief flooded her body.

"Why? What have you been thinking of me, Miss Swan?" I asked and her cheeks flushed pink.

"How do I know you're not just telling me that to make me feel better and not so angry with you," she accused and I laughed.

"Because if I could then I would be able to tell why you just blushed at my question, but since I can't it makes me extremely curious to know why you did," I whispered as I slowly lifted myself to bring my face closer to hers.

I wanted to see if I could do this with out hurting her.

Slowly I brought my hand to her neck and brought her down slowly as my lips slowly traced over hers. I could feel her warm breath on my lips and could taste her on my tongue. Moving at a slow pace even for humans I brought my lips to hers and gently put more pressure.

I kissed her softly moving my lips with her and never felt a feeling more…

There were no words to describe how I felt with her warm lips moving with mine and making them warm.

I broke the kiss and moved my lips to her soft neck. Bella was breathing heavily as I reached her shoulder. I slowly made my way back to her neck leaving soft butterfly kisses. I could feel her heart beating faster and faster with every kiss I placed and I was happy I could have an affect on her.

I made my lips to her jaw and slowly traced up to the corner of her lips before I pulled myself away and lay back down on the bed.

"See, I could only assume your thoughts ran along those line but I can't be for certain," I informed her and she gulped.

"Th-that was mean," she stuttered and shook her head.

"So how come you can't read my mind? And how do you read minds I mean like do you have limits or—"

"One question at a time. I don't know why I can't read your thoughts. I haven't told anyone I couldn't and I haven't asked about it. I also don't know why I can read thoughts. Carlisle suspects that I could sense people's thoughts as a human and I could always know what they were thinking by reading facial expressions and movements. I could read in between the lines and so he thinks as a vampire I could just see inside they're mind," I explained and could see her eyes light with more questions.

I placed a finger on her lips so I could continue.

"I can hear what people think. Most of the time it is extremely annoying but it comes in handy once and a while. I can hear everyone thoughts and it isn't like I can shut it on and off. But most of the time it is just a buzz in my head. A bunch of buzzes and images until I focus on one person then I can hear there and see inside there mind clear as a bell," I finished.

"So you can see what people think also? I mean if they're dreaming you can still see it?" she asked and I nodded. Her eyes lit with wonder.

I sighed and prepared myself for the topic I wanted to avoid but before I could open my mouth to bring up the topic Bella beat me to it.

"Edward we need to talk about Alex," Bella breathed and I stiffened. "I was just going to say that," I said and ran a hand through my hair.

"I think I need to talk to him the only problem is I don't know how?" she said and looked toward her window.

"Bella I don't think you can? Alex is gone," I said simply and her eyes shot to me.

"What? Why?" she asked and I looked away from her gaze.

"I told him to leave." I wasn't going to lie to her. I had done enough of that.

"Why?" I could hear the anger.

"We got into an argument and it didn't end well. I told him to leave. If he has any common sense at all he'll listen," I said and turned my gaze toward her.

Hey eyes were on fire.

"What was the argument about? And don't you dare just say, you. I want specifics," she said and I could tell she was trying to be calm.

"He was thinking about changing you," I answered and her eyes grew wide.

"Well it is going to happen soon enough isn't it? So what's the difference who does it!" she snapped.

"Bella he would kill you. He doesn't have enough control. I doubt I have enough control. And I am not changing you," I growled and lifted myself off the bed.

"Why not?!" she shouted and I sighed. I did not want to have this conversation again.

"Bella I just don't want to do this to you. Do you have any idea how much I would miss this? You being human!" I sighed and sat on the bed to place a hand on her cheek.

She placed one of her hands on mine and leaned into my touch.

"You don't want me to change? Is it because you're in love with the human me and you can't love me any other way," she said and her voice choked.

"Of course not Bella. I would love you no matter what you were. I love _you_. Not what creature you are," I said and looked at me with watery eyes.

"Then change me!"

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**Okay I was not going to update today but I had already written the chapter and I just thought to give it to you after that long wait I made you suffer. So I was really happy with the reviews and I just wanted to thank everyone for reviewing. I mean the average for my chapter are like 20 reviews. It is truly amazing so thank you. I mean I don't even have a chapter under twenty reviews except for the last chapter so WOW! Thanks so much. So if you want an update than you have to review! **

**Quick thanks to **_**BellaandEdwardLover **_**who when I opened my email yesterday filled it up with like 13 reviews for Never Should Have and Maybe You Should. So thanks for reading and enjoying my story. **

**Okay that is about all I have to say in this A/N except for: REVIEW (please)**

**Lots of love Twilightholic-Tanya :D**


	12. Last Bite

Maybe You Should

**Alright guys I know that I haven't updated but I have been avoiding it because sadly this is the end. Yea it is coming to a finish. But I don't know if you remember but Never Should Have wasn't suppose to have a sequel but I decided to keep going and have a happy ending. So as much as I hate to say this.**

**IMPORTANT: this will be the last chapter. Yea I'm sad too.**

**Well on with the story.**

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_Love is…when you've made it.-comic by Kim Casali _

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"Bella I don't think I can," I said and looked away from her.

"Edward, if I'm ready to give up my humanity, I don't think you should take it to protect it," she said softly but it only sparked my anger.

"Bella you have no idea what you're giving up? You're giving Charlie and your mother? Your future and your friends? You can never be human again and I don't think I'm worth it," I growled and she smiled.

"Edward can I ask you something?"

I looked away from her and she took it as a yes.

"If the situation was in reverse. If I was the vampire and you the human. Would you want to be changed to be with me? Even if that meant giving everything up?" she asked and I knew the answer.

Yes, of course I would. I would do anything to be with Bella and my human life would mean little but it wasn't the same.

"We're not on equal terms in that. I never had a family to be with. I never had a mother who loved and cared for me. I never had a father who teased or played with me. I never wanted a future. I had nothing to hold me back but you do," I argued.

"That's not true. You had Esme and Alice and Carlisle. You had them all. You had a family whether or not you want to admit it and you wanted a future. You wanted to have children and have a house and a job I know you did. I saw the look in your face that night," she shot back.

"But I only want that future with you."

"How do you think I feel?"

I stared at her and I finally realized that she did know what she was getting herself into and yet she still wanted it. I realized I had lost the argument.

"Let's go for a walk," I suggested. "But it's dark out," she said and I smiled.

"Yes but tomorrow I won't be able to. It's going to be sunny," I stated and her eyes grew wide.

"What you can't go into the sun?"

"No we could go in but well not where people can see," I said and she raised an eyebrow.

"I'll show you but first let's go for a walk," I said and kissed her forehead before walking out of the room.

I walked toward the living room and glanced at the photo's that had been hung. I felt a strange urge of déjà vu and I couldn't figure out why. Then it hit me.

It felt like the first time I had been invited into Bella's house. Six years ago.

I smiled as I glanced at her pictures.

There were some with Alex and her standing somewhere that looked vaguely familiar.

I felt her come up behind me. "Did you visit Chicago?" I asked as I stared at the picture.

"Yea, Alex had some family living there and we decided to go sight seeing," she said and I smiled at where the picture took place.

"Have you ever seen the fountain at night?" I asked.

"No we were only in the city during the day. But I would love to," she sighed.

"It is quite a sight. Very beautiful," I commented and she smiled. "Well I've seen pictures," she said and I snorted. "A picture can't compare to the real thing."

"I guess not but it was still a lovely image even without all the lights," she said and I laughed.

"Yes, I guess," I said simply and took her hand in mine. "Let's go," I said and she smiled.

We walked out the apartment and into the street. "So where else have you been?" I asked.

"I've been to Chicago and New York and that was about it. We moved to London about a year ago," she informed me and it occurred to me just how much I've missed out on.

"So where have you been?" she asked and I laughed.

"Surprisingly not many places. Alice took me to Paris once. Just to visit see some sights, but that was about it. I've been living in London since the accident," I told her and she kept her eyes ahead.

We walked in silence and I noticed just how empty the streets were.

"I've missed you," she whispered softly and I glanced down at her. She was looking at her feet while we walked.

"I don't think you realize how much I've missed you. I didn't want to leave just like that but I had no choice. If I would have went to see you, I don't think I would have had enough control,"

"No instead you sent me a letter," she said and looked up at me with clear brown eyes.

"It was the only thing I could think of. Every word I wrote felt like it could kill me because I knew what it would do to you," I confessed.

She smiled and I could see her eyes brightened. "But you're here now and that's more than I could ask for," she said and leaned into my side. I felt at complete bliss. I had wanted this since the moment I left.

It was hard leaving her and I knew that what we had was more than just love. It was a strong force. As though nothing in the word could keep us apart, like fate doing its job.

I had never loved being in fates control but I realized it was for the best. It would work out in the end and I finally noticed that. I finally understood.

"So where do you live?" she asked and brought me out of my thoughts.

"Would you like me to show you?" I asked and she smiled.

--

I opened the door to the house slowly. I only heard Carlisle and Alice's thoughts. No one else was around.

"Hello Bella," Alice's chirpy voice came from the living room. "Hello Alice," Bella said without missing a beat.

I led her into the living room where Alice was reading a book. She had gotten much farther than I thought she would.

She closed the book and looked up with a smile planted on her face. "It's been a while," she said and Bella nodded and looked around the living room. It was a sight I guess. It was very open and bright.

"You guys never settle for anything less than best, I'm guessing," she said and I chuckled.

_He's gone just to let you know. He didn't want to leave but Emmett and Jasper got the best of him_

Alice sent me through her thoughts while looking at Bella. She looked at me and I nodded my head slightly.

_Have you made up your mind_?

I rolled me eyes and she sighed. Bella looked at her and Alice painted the smile back on and walked over to Bella. She grasped her shoulders and looked her in the eyes. "I would never reject to having you join us. Let me know when you get through to him," she said and walked out of the room.

Bella looked at me and smiled. "Looks like it's two votes against one," she said and I glared. "My vote is higher," I teased and she huffed. "That isn't fair," she grumbled and I took her hand as I placed a soft kiss on her knuckles.

"All is in love and war," I said simply and she rolled her eyes.

I held her hand tighter and started to go toward the stairs. "Where are you taking me?" she asked as she followed behind.

"My room,"

As we walked along the hallway Carlisle came out of his office. He smiled toward us and nodded his head toward Bella. "Happy to see you again, Bella. Under better circumstances," he said and she smiled.

"Like wise."

_I'm off to the hospital. Be sure to tell Esme, when she returns with Rosalie from shopping,_ Carlisle thought as he walked away from us.

Bella stared after him but I only took her hand in mine and continued going where I first intended.

I opened the door slowly and she walked in. my room was smaller than the one I use to have but since I was the only family member with out a bed it didn't matter because I still had plenty of space.

She walked over to the sofa and sat down slowly like she had the first time she was in my room. I smiled enjoying the sight for as long as I could before I walked over and joined her.

"No bed?" she asked raising an eyebrow.

"Well I believe I told you I don't sleep so what was the use of having one?"

"Touché," she said and I smiled.

I pushed her hair away from her face as I stared at her eyes. I had missed them so much and I was finally being able to see them.

"So are you going to change me?" she asked and I sighed having the moment ruined.

"I can't Bella. I don't think I should do it," I said knowing I had given in.

She leaned in closer and kissed my lips slowly.

"Or maybe you should," she whispered against my lips and I brought her closer as I kissed her lips trying to figure out what to do. She broke away gasping for air and I trailed my lips down her jaw and slowly toward her neck.

She wanted this so who was I to deny it from her? Why shouldn't I be selfish for a while? Why shouldn't I change her?

She was right: _maybe you should._

With her words ringing in my head I opened my lips and bit down on her neck.

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**The End!**

**I bet all of you are in between :**_**Yes**_**! and **_**What**_**! **_**You can't end it like that!**_

**But yes I have it is finished and the story is off my back. Phew! What a relief to finally finish it. :D I am beyond happy. Okay well review and tell me how you like my ending. Thank every single one of you for reviewing and posting as a favorite. I am sad to say it has to come to an end but yes it has to. Well it was a fun journey while it lasted and I am glad it finished. Thanks for taking the journey with me. **

**Now I have a new story out called Waiting for Twilight! You're free to take a look at it if you haven't already. I can't stay away from drama so it will have the slight twist and turns but it will be different than this one. **

**Well I am done. I had lots of fun sharing this story with you and I'm glad you liked it but as they say all good things MUST come to an end! **

**Lots of Love Twilightholic-Tanya :')**

**1 more day until Breaking Dawn!**


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